


Tell Me My Body Is Trouble

by thenotyetpublishedpen



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Andy responds to street harrassment, Gen, Minor Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova, One Shot, Pre-Canon, catcalling
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-13 12:15:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29028540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thenotyetpublishedpen/pseuds/thenotyetpublishedpen
Summary: A man catcalls Andy. It doesn't go well for him.
Comments: 5
Kudos: 66





	Tell Me My Body Is Trouble

**Author's Note:**

> This is set in modern New York City sometime pre-canon. 
> 
> A short one-shot. Expect more Old Guard content from me at some point. 
> 
> Title from Elizabeth Acevedo's poem "After"

The team walked down the city street, enjoying the feeling of New York in the fall. They’d just finished up a mission that had gone down especially well. None of them had died even once and the would-be terrorist was no longer anyone’s problem. It was a surprisingly simple success, but she wasn’t going to question it. Over the millennia she’d been alive, Andy learned that sometimes you just had to take the easy victories. 

Nothing was on Andy’s mind but trying to see if the little Greek deli that was there sixty or so years ago was still open. Memories of their baklava, made in a surprisingly traditional way, made her mouth water. 

Thoughts of distractingly delicious pastry were, perhaps, why she didn’t acknowledge the man staring lewdly at her, at first. She was aware of him, as any woman who’d lived in the world was aware of the presence of a strange man, but he didn’t merit her attention. Well, not until he spoke. 

“Ugh, I hate when women cut their hair short. It’s much sexier long.”

Andy turned around slowly and looked at the man who dared to speak to her. She catalogued his weaknesses with a glance, noticing the slight shift in his weight to spare his left knee, the slope of his shoulders that suggested he was more used to single bar-room punches than all out brawls. Pathetic. He thought that he was worth her time?

Her brothers stopped walking, Joe touching Nicky’s hand in a silent request for him to pay attention. This was going to be good.

“One hundred she kicks his ass.” Booker said to Nicky out of the corner of his mouth. 

“Oh!” Andy said, voice dropping into a tone that those who did not know her might call sweet, “It is short, isn’t it? I am  _ so _ sorry… that you seem to think that I care even one bit about what you think. What must it be like to operate under the delusion that your opinion matters? How  _ embarrassing  _ for you.”

She raised an eyebrow and cocked her head to the side, still smiling serenely. The man sputtered and walked away. Booker sighed and opened his wallet to pay Nicky, when the man made an unfortunate (or fortunate for Booker) mistake.

“Crazy bitch,” He muttered under his breath. 

In one smooth move Andy knocked the man’s legs out from under him, grabbing him by the back of his shirt inches before he fell into oncoming traffic. His clothes rippled with the wind from the cars that rushed past. 

“Next time you say something unpleasant to a woman.  _ Any _ woman. I let you fall.” She said, “and my hearing is  _ very _ good.”

She yanked him backwards, out of the immediate crushed-by-car danger, and tossed him uncaringly onto his hands and knees on the sidewalk before walking away without another word. 

“That counts!” Booker crowed, “Pay up!”

Andy shook her head fondly and kept walking, leaving them to argue about the specifics of what constituted an ass kicking. Her boys would catch up. Besides, if she beat them to the restaurant then that meant more sweet treats just for her. She shook her head, relishing in the lightness of not being weighed down by hair. She truly loved this haircut. Besides, she smirked a half smile as a woman blushed with wide eyes, this hair  _ really _ wasn’t for men. 


End file.
